SHOW ME YOUR HANDS NOW. SHOW ME YOUR HANDS. MA'AM, STOP. DO NOT MOVE. I DON'T KNOW WHAT'S going on, though. I They told me I have to change my address. Okay. Well, you didn't do it. I know, but I'm currently working on that. The female told me that I have to change my address. They harass me, bro. Back in the car. I didn't even know. I'm not doing that. You can't make the car. Nope. Calling. Don't touch me, bro. Behind your back, bro. My head's behind my back. People can make a lot of stupid decisions, but today we have a very special list of criminals who take things from dumb to dumber. Behold, the dumbest criminals ever. Will they smarten up when they come face to face with the law? Let's find out. About the ATM. So, right. Yeah. No, I have an account. So, I was trying to get it and it was it was like that none was open, but you could see the camera and take no money. I was trying to fix it. In Albuquerque, New Mexico, police respond to a call about a man trying to tamper with ATM machines in different banks. But don't worry, he's got a perfectly understandable excuse. Get on the ground now. Get on the ground. Okay, right now you're being detained. Okay, you're not free to go anywhere. Do you have any weapons with you? Hands on your head. Hands on your head. Any noodles? Oh, yeah. Where? right side. Looks like we're the employees going to get a white look like a man on the on the right hand. This is fine. Do you want to put 25? Yeah. Yeah. ATM. So, right. Yeah. Well, I have an account. So, I was trying to get it and it was like that. No. It was open, but you could see the camera. I didn't take no money. I was trying to fix it. And then and then take a look at the ATM to see who's Yeah. Yeah. What's your first name, sir? Mario Basquez. Mario Vasquez. All right. Thank you. Let me run. Let me get this straight. He was going from machine to machine to help the banks fix their ATMs. That's his defense. What could be wrong with these machines? While one officer checks the man's background, other officers get witness statements. So, what did he break? He had this whole thing outside. So, he pulled it out here. He had the keyboard out. He had um ox cords plugged in. Okay. So, he like destroyed it. Huh? Yes, sir. Oh, okay. So, can I open it? Okay. So, how does he open it? Do you know or just like that? Is it doesn't secure? It's not supposed to open all this or anything. Okay. So, this is We got him in custody. You did? Yeah. Okay. Do you want to do a field ID real quick? I'll go drive you over there. He's just down the road. Sure. Here. You got in the back. Do you want to prosecute? Um, that's up to Well, you're the manager, so you're right. So, you're uh you kind of get to decide uh that's something you all want to do. Sure. Uh how much do you think uh that's going to cost you all to fix that? a good 5,000. The price of the damage is important because that helps determine the man's charges. And it looks like this very steep bill is going to make the charges a felony. After the bank manager identifies the thief, they can then legally arrest him. All right, let's be careful with that. Did you locate it? Yeah, I'll get it. Whatever. Can you step out for me? Let's face the unit over here. All right, ma'am. So, you are under arrest for criminal damage. Okay. So, I'm going to do a search into this arrest. And I understand you you'll get a statement from you and all that once we memorandize you and all that. Okay. I'm just going to do a full search though. Get anything out of your pockets or anything like that. Okay. You have needles anywhere else that I need to be aware of. So under arrest. Yeah. And then you're going to talk to the primary officer. Okay. He's going to come and talk to you. You arrested for what? So apparently you damage property and that damage that thing was already open there. Does this criminal really think the police are that dumb? He didn't just tamper with one machine. He tried to break into several. It seems pretty unlikely that all the ATMs were like that before he got there. Remember like I didn't break. It was already open. You know what I mean? Like that that that I mean the the ATM was already open. Okay. You know what I mean? I was trying to get it started again cuz they they went down. You know what I mean? It kept going down so I kept trying to get it up. Or vapor face that one widening your stance. Did you want that or is that just going to be trash? Trash. Okay. Man, you have needles everywhere, man. Might actually be too big. Looks like they caught this dumb thief red-handed with actual pieces of the ATM that he broke off. It doesn't look like he intends to go home and fix them. After the police collect and tag all the evidence, they let him tell his side of the story. So, what happened at the ATM over there at the at the PNC bank? Like, what were you doing over there? Into the account? Like, what do you mean into an account? Do you have a bank card? Well, I I thought I had a bank. I made an account, but I guess you need to go through. Let me open this up a little easier. Uhhuh. You made an account. You didn't go through. Yeah. But um I thought it did. You know what I mean? Cuz I kept putting the code, the code, the code, and then it wouldn't come in. It wouldn't come. I mean, it wouldn't process. It wouldn't process. And then all of a sudden, it just boom. Like it just went. You know what I mean? Like it just But do you have a bank card? Uh, no, no, no, not I. I lost it. How are you going to get the money out though if you didn't have a bank? Because the So PNC has one where it's um like you you don't need the card. It's it's it's a code number. It's an access code number. Yeah. You just put that in instead of putting Gotcha. So um explain to me what you were doing then. Um you find the code. Yeah. So that's what I was doing to see if I qualified for the for the account and then um that was it. And then it just like it just reset on me like it the whole thing reset on me. So I was like what? So then I kind of like moved it and then you know popped it open and I was like hey wait it was open you know it was already open. So I just try to move the things like I try to put them together like the wires. That's all I was doing though I was just trying to put the wires together like you know what I mean? Uh no we have no idea what you mean. And every ATM has a two-step authentication process. You always need an ID and a PIN. Being the dumb crook that he is, he clearly didn't think this through. And his stupid lies just continue. And then, and then what? So, so you say you were trying to create an account. Yeah. No, no, that was days before. No, no, no. Yeah, but apparently you didn't. I don't know. I don't know. Might have gone through it. You know what I mean? Yeah. Yeah. It's just an access code that I have. So, you twisted some wires in there, you said. No, no, I didn't twist the wires. I just try to put the you know what I mean, thing back together. Like, what I'm saying? Like when you um you're right here and the wire comes off, you know, just like that. You know what I mean? So I I guess how did you end up with a bunch of the parts for the ATM in your pockets though in your person? Because they were there, brother. They would you know what I mean? They were they were there like inside a thing. So I just picked them up in case I needed them if I needed them. So what could he possibly need ATM parts for? This man obviously thinks the cops are stupid, but the only person he's proving to be dumb is himself. Does he really think these lies are going to get him off the hook? Do you typically take parts for ATMs or No, I typically don't even work on ATMs, bro. You know what I mean? It was just this one that, you know, happened to go and it was there, so I just mean What's up with the brass knuckles? There's some brass knuckles on you. Oh, I don't know. Yeah, you can't have those. Yeah, with protection. No, can't have those. M. Okay. You can't have them. You recall remembering whenever we patted you down to make sure you didn't have any weapons? Yeah. Remember we asked you why we were patting you down? Yeah. On each disclose that you had any weapons on you? That's considered a weapon. Well, how did you get him? The brass knuckles. How'd you get him? Did you buy him somewhere or in the street? In the street. Found them in the street. Found them in the street. Mhm. Gotcha. This guy can't even look the officer in the eye when he says that. He knows the cops can tell that he's lying. If he's telling the truth, then he must be a really lucky man to stumble upon open ATMs and shiny brass knuckles. Can you get a citation? No. It wasn't that bad, man. Of what? So, who is the owner of the breast? Are they yours now? You found them? Yeah. Okay. So, they're yours? No. Well, I mean, they found them. I don't know. You just found them. I haven't even picked them up. Where? Where did you find them? In the park. Which one? Carla? Which part? Uh Carl. The one right there where you know you cross over to uh the mall. Like Carl and what? I don't know. Carl and I don't know. Probably. No. I don't think there's a park though. Freeway. So unfortunately Yeah. I have to charge you with burglary of the ATM. Okay. Burglary of ATM? No dog. Come on. I didn't even steal. Well, you had ATM parts on you. No, man. They were from there, bro. Like, I didn't break them. You know what I'm saying? Like, they were already there. Like, that's why the machine was up. Wow. He really likes doubling down on this stupid explanation. It's possible he's gotten into the same trouble before because he tried to ask if he can just get a citation and he probably got away back then, too. So, so they have uh pictures of you in the ATM and all that, right, boss? I know. I have to, bro. I don't have a choice. All right. All right. Just be cool with me. I'll be chill with you. All right. I'm not sure who I give you a hard time. Come on, man. Look at the look at the camera and see if I'm really trying to steal. You know what I mean? Like, come on. Was that We have the witness. Yeah, but that already opened though. I didn't take [ __ ] I mean, I could have. There's thousands of dollars in that mother. That'd be hard to do that. There's Well, there is, but to get to the money. That's what I'm saying. Like, come on, dog. I didn't even with it cuz I'm not trying to go to jail. I'm not trying to fell. Let me ask you this, man. So why did you take all the papers in there like that specifically says like your ATM? Yeah. Yeah. So so I can work with it, bro. So I can work with it because it said how to do it. It said there how to do it. You know what I mean? Like I know how to do it, bro. It just kept resetting, bro. Like the phone like like some of those papers look like they're like admin stuff like not for the public like for workers that mess with the machine. Yeah. Yeah. That Well, that paper was in the machine. The paper that I have that was in the machine. That was in the machine itself. This guy's so dumb. He doesn't understand that he just admitted to stealing administrative papers and personal information from bank clients from inside the machine. He thinks he's explaining himself, but all he's doing is digging a bigger hole for himself and playing right into the hands of the police. They charged the man with felony commercial burglary. The cops know that the holidays are also peak season for stupid behavior. On December 21st, 2021, police located a stolen vehicle in a Home Depot parking lot. They waited to see if the suspects would exit the vehicle. But after some time, they decided to approach the vehicle. And that's when one of the suspects made their first stupid mistake. Going to run. Going to run. Mark, PUT YOUR HANDS UP. OUT OF THE CAR. OUT OF THE CAR. GET DOWN. DRIVER, GIVE ME YOUR HANDS. SHOW ME YOUR HANDS NOW. MOVE OVER HERE. PUT YOUR HANDS UP HERE. COME TOWARDS ME RIGHT NOW. SHOW ME YOUR HANDS. SHOW ME YOUR HANDS NOW. GIVE ME YOUR HANDS. HANDS ON YOUR HEAD, PASSENGER. HANDS ON YOUR HEAD. HANDS ON YOUR HEAD. STOP. Turn away. Put your hands on your head. Hit. SHOW ME YOUR HANDS NOW. SHOW THEM YOUR HANDS. MA'AM, STOP. DO NOT MOVE. STOP. Get on the move. Right. Taser deployments. Do not move. Don't move. I got a piss. I don't care. Don't move. The people inside the car were extremely dumb for not complying and refusing to open the car door. What did they think was going to happen? Also, in the middle of situations like this, it's probably not the best time to let the officers know that you have to use the bathroom. DO NOT MOVE. DO NOT MOVE. I WILL TASE YOU. DO NOT MOVE. Stay where you're at. OUT OF THE CAR NOW. STEP OUT OF THE CAR NOW. Keep your hands on your face. Get on the ground. On the ground. Do not move. Get over on your stomach. What did I do? Hey, what did I do? Put your hands behind your back. Put your hand down here. I'll explain it to you in a second. I'll explain it to you in a second. Please be soldier. Hey, what did I do? You got no weapons on you, Mom. With guns drawn on them, this couple still took their sweet time to talk and share a kiss. But Bonnie and Clyde here are stupid for not complying with the police because they just racked up another charge. Guys, take him into custody. He has not been searched. I'll keep lethal. He has not been searched at all. ANYBODY IN HERE? MAKE YOURSELF DOWN NOW. Look for me. Let's put her in the back of the Let's put her in the back. No, no one got hit. Okay. With the taser. Okay. Like almost close enough to us. My pants. Okay. Have a seat for us. What do I do? There's still a vehicle. Really? What's your name? And don't lie to me cuz we're going to find out. What's your name? All right, man. I need your ID and I need to figure it out. So, can I get your finger so I can read it? No. [Music] All right. Read it up at the jail. This guy thinks that refusing to identify himself might help him avoid jail, but he's pretty dumb if that's what he thinks. It actually causes you to stay in jail longer because the cops can hold you until they can properly identify you, even if it takes weeks. Oddly enough, it was it was a stolen car and oddly enough, there are weapons. Yeah, I don't know nothing about that. So, I You don't know anything about anything in there? I was I was asleep and I was getting ready to depart. Company was Where did you meet them? I I think at that point I think I need my attorney cuz I don't even know my charges. I think a good attorney is best, you know. No problem, man. I don't even know what you're charging. You're dragging this out for like no reason. Cuz what's going to happen is we're going to have to take your fingerprints. We're going to send them to CBI. It's going to go to FBI and they're going to give us your whole life story when you can just be a man and talk. Give us your real name cuz we're going to know what it is. You're just figing out for darn jokes. You're going to sit in a cold cell for a long time cuz we're going to make it. You're going to have to wait to get a response. That's going to stall the time for you to go upstairs with the blankets. You don't get blankets down here. Um, so obviously you got they say you had a warrant. Uh, it doesn't look like because of CO and all that. I don't think they're going to do anything with it. Okay. Um, now your boyfriend or your husband trying to figure if if he's got so if he's got warrants, uh, we got to clear that up and see, you know, you know what I'm saying? And you know, a lot of the warrants, they're not even taken. Okay. Well, I I just I'm just wanting to see if you if you're able to Does he have warrants, though? Obviously, all three of these suspects made a plan to stay silent. Maybe that's what they were discussing for so long in the van. But soon, the woman's calm demeanor begins to crack and her real personality shines through. Intelligently asked me to tell him to walk. I already asked. You heard me. You just want a person. I'm here. I'm standing here. If you guys ask me, maybe I could talk to him. You know, the intelligent thing to do, right? You can't ask. He's asking to walk as crooked as tell you don't want to let me send a message. We understand what your job is, dude, but you also have a job to do the right thing. You're not doing the right thing. Okay. The you guys think that you guys could do that like this, but we can't. You guys should be charged too then, right? Am I not right? Why do you get to break the rules, but we can't? You haven't let me talk yet. No. Why would I? No, cuz you told you don't let me talk. Just tell me what to do. You know what that means? Literally. Yeah. Like if you ask a question, I will answer it. You just ask if I know it literally, please. Yeah. You know what that means? No. See, look at that. Look at that. I'm trying to explain it to you, baby. Daddy, I love you. Well, things definitely took a turn. She somehow thinks the cops have done something illegal, so therefore it should be okay for her to commit a crime, too. Nothing this woman's saying makes any sense at all. And things continue to escalate. You realize none of that would happen if you just said his name. No, doesn't have to. Give it to you. It's all right to not. What did you get about that? Please start talking to me again. We are allowed to do that so you can get ID. We're allowed to do that. So you refusing is not going to get you anywhere. It's not It makes you look pretty stupid when men have over here and put their hands all over you and force you to do something. It really is immature. It's like a child. So what's going to happen is what I'm telling you. You're going to you're going to take take my personal. This guy just continues to get dumber and dumber. He's not fooling anyone by spitting out his halfbaked legal jargon. He's got no idea what he's talking about and the cops don't have the time to take him to law school. Stop. Stop. Why you bitching, bro? You know what? Okay. Well, you're not cooperating, so take a knee. And you can't take it out close. Absolutely. That's We're on camera. Look right up there. So, you can bring it up later. Take a knee. Yeah. Take a knee. All right. Cool. Now, you going to let me take your shirt off or I'm going to cut it up? All right. Cheers. I'm talking about shirts. Sergeant, this is the way you made it. No, I didn't. You made it this way. Excuse me. Anyone? Help. Take my clothes off me. I can't take my clothes off me like this. Yes, you can. No, you can't. You won't answer any questions. No. So what? So you physically assault me? Oh, I don't assault. Does this man not realize that all these police officers are wearing body cameras? He's got to be really stupid to think that any judge is going to look at these accusations and think that somehow this is some sort of assault. Either you can lay in your stomach, dude, or we can cut them off. You cut my clothes off. We're not going to cut it off. You assault assault. If you cut my clothes off, you know what? But release your legs. Let them say it's not. Yes, it is. Now we are going to cut him off. Yeah. You bing my wrist. Stop my wrist. You dumb. You let go of my you. [Music] Repeating the same accusations over and over again doesn't make them true. And now this suspect can add insulting law enforcement to the long list of idiotic things he's chosen to do. Let go of me. Let go of me. I'm not letting go of you. Let go of me. You [ __ ] You want to take my clothes off? Need the scissors. Scissors. Scissors. One more pair of shorts. My wristwatch. Stand up and put your hands on the foot. The body implied lifestyle might seem exciting, but it only leads to a not so glamorous ending. These stupid thieves were charged with aggravated motor vehicle theft, possession of weapons, possession of burglary tools, resisting arrest, and obstructing a peace officer. Two officers were on patrol in Columbus, Ohio when they spotted the black smoke of a growing fire. When they arrived on scene, they realized it was a middle school building. Jesus Christ. There's a fire. Somebody looks like somebody's back there. We active 25 behind middle school on the trailer out back. You can send fire this way. Okay. I got one fire extinguisher. Somebody lit a mattress on in the rear wheel and it's got the porch on fire leading up to the trailer over there and Yeah, dude. It's It's I'm out. Step back in case this thing blows. Unfortunately, the officer's already used up his fire extinguisher. The only option now is to wait in a safe area until the firefighters arrive. Who would set a school on fire? And I'm wondering if they're still close by. Somebody just set the mask on fire. [Music] All right, Sam. And chopper, if you see anybody in the area, this thing was just lit within the last four minutes or so. That's oddly specific timing. Is there an entrance over here? Can you give me a couple more on that where the fire is? You want me to move this out of the way? Get this thing out of the way. All right. Somebody just lit a mattress on fire and caught the whole uh ramp on fire. Where you coming from, man? Where you coming from? Huh? Did you see anybody out here lighting this stuff on fire? You lit it on fire. Well, that's a first. A suspect who confesses to a crime before the police even consider him a suspect. Is he actually telling the truth or is he just crazy? Why'd you light it on fire? Why is that? Keep your hands out your pockets. Hanging out. Huh? Hanging out. Who's hanging out? Yeah. I was out here hanging out. That's okay. All right. Put your hands behind your back. So, you walked just walked up and lit it on fire. And through your own admission, you're stating [Music] Well, I'm not going to ask you more questions. I trying I'll try and get the TV from out of here. Let's just walk. Have a seat right there, Kervin. Okay. Watch your head, buddy. Watch your head. Perfect. There you go. Have a seat right here. Thank you, sir. He's a B and a half, right? and he's through his own statement. He said, "Yeah, I wanted the TV inside of there. It's got a credit card with his name on it." I think he taped the entrance. 30 minutes. I said, "Yeah, sir." Okay. Yeah. He walked up and he said, "I lit it on fire." I said, "What?" He wanted I went to school a long time ago here. I wanted the TV out. I wonder what thought process he went through to come up with this idea of burning the building to help him steal something inside. The man was charged with arson but was later found to be incompetent to stand trial. He was ordered to be placed inside a mental hospital for 6 months so they could later evaluate his competency. In Marcelon, Wisconsin in May 2024, police were notified of a speeding red motorcyclist on the highway. A patrol car stationed on the highway spotted the motorcyclist speeding past him at 90 mph and he quickly pursued him. There's a red motorcycle passing on the shoulder westbound. Approximately 90 miles per hour, 33 country club. [Music] Still trying to catch up 4 33 25 mile speed at 923. comparison tag update received. So continuing high rate of speed, I will not pursue. Advise the return, please. Due to concerns about public safety, they eventually stopped chasing the motorcyclist. The cops used the license plate to find Mr. Speedy's identity, but his home address had not been updated yet, forcing them to turn to the public, asking for help on Facebook for any leads whatsoever, while also giving the man a chance to reach out to the police and explain his behavior. 1050 to my uh squad here at Park Downtown. It is turning westbound on 16 331 William Charles returns on a red Suzuki. 3325. That'll be the same description of a red Suzuki. 3300 additional was parked downtown with no lights on. You came by me. He did run into my squad with he's going from Pierce. So he's actually West Cook and Castle. Copy. Eastbound back into the city. Cook and C32 behind [Music] 433 red light. South Wisconsin. through the red lights. All those gone. Another deputy remembered this red motorcycle man from a previous traffic stop and remembered him saying that he lived nearby. The cops used realtor sites to find out which homes had been recently sold in the area. Somehow they narrowed things down to the suspect's house and asked neighbors to call them when the man returned home. [Music] Let's go. There he is. Hello. Hi there. How are you? You good? How about you? Good. How you? Yeah. Okay. We need to talk. Okay. Okay. So, you know why we're here? Yep. Okay. So, why would we be here? Okay. You have an ID with you? You don't need to go in yet. This one. Looks like this punk doesn't really seem to care why the police are there, which makes me think he did it all on purpose and he already knows what's coming for him. Now it's time for the cops to finally hear his side of the story. Before you go reach in the car, man, you got any weapons in there or anything? Okay. So, what about the motorcycle? I don't know. Yesterday. Okay. What happened yesterday? It wasn't working. So, uh going 100. Going 100. Yeah. Why did you do that? I had a really bad day and I Yeah, I wanted to blow off some steam and I just wasn't paying attention to what my speed was and then I saw one and then I just saw one what? Cop car and then I just kept going because I Why didn't you stop for me? Dude, I couldn't lose my license. I was freaking the out. I It's a speeding ticket though, bro. But like the thing is I just bought this house and I have a job and that was all that was going through my mind. I was like, "Dude, I can't lose my license. I I just bought this house." As the cop points out, his excuse is pretty dumb. If he cared that much about his life, then he shouldn't have been so reckless with it. Is this man being sincere? Or is he just trying to gain sympathy from the police? What do you think? You know, it wasn't. Just relax, man. Just talk to me. I mean, it's it was a speeding ticket. So, I mean, when when the cop turned around, I I honestly thought about just crashing my bike and myself. I'm not going to lie. Over a speeding ticket. Yes, dude. I My It's a My experience with cops has been awful and I just I don't know. My life was just going good. So, I was like, it's I either end it right now as it's going good or like I try and get away. And that's what I did. So, you saw you saw his license and sirens. I mean, it's one of those I mean, I didn't see the first guys, but second, dude. Yeah. Uh, how did he know there were first guys if he didn't ever see them? Did he see that Facebook post and just ignore it? Threatening your own life is very serious. But I'm still not convinced this man really means what he's saying because his story just doesn't make any sense. So, you took off cuz you didn't want to lose your license. Yeah. How fast did you get up to? 140. Okay. Intel. Out of town. Out of town. Sounds like you're going pretty fast in city, too. Yeah. Lose some red lights. One of them. Yeah. Sounds like you got in a crash, too. Yeah. I lost you there. How bad's the bike damaged? That's it. That's it. Didn't hurt yourself? Nope. I didn't hurt myself. Why does he look so smug and proud when he tells the officer how fast he was able to go? But speeding is not the only thing this dumb kid has to worry about. The officer then delivers some information that would shock the suspect. Did you crash into? Uh some guy in a black like SUV just tried to pin me against another car. You know who you crashed into? I have no idea. The actual sheriff himself. Okay. kind of dangerous. You know it's not okay to take off from the police, right? I know. I know. All right. You know that when the lights come on, you have to stop. When the sirens come on, you definitely need to stop, right? Yeah. Okay. So, you heard the lights and sirens. You just didn't want to lose your license. Yeah. I was freaking out, dude. I Okay. was on my adrenaline rush. I just I Yeah. Why didn't you just call us afterwards? I made a mistake. I don't know. I was freaking out. It's all over Facebook now. They kind of tried to give you an opportunity to just kind of make it right. I mean, so you know that you can't flee. You know that's fleeting and looting, right? I didn't think about anything yesterday. Okay. You know that if you get in a crash, you're required to stop. You can't just keep going. You Okay. You do know that. I I honestly didn't think I did too much to be honest. Doesn't matter if you're involved in a crash, right? Oh, I I He doesn't think he did that much. He was going about double the speed limit on busy highways and downtown streets where he could have easily endangered innocent people's lives. Also evaded the police, crashed into another vehicle and ran a red light. What exactly is his definition of not that much? I have no excuses. I I truly I have nothing. Can't run stop signs, stop lights, and all that stuff. Okay. No, I was just I bought a lawn mower to mow the lawn because I had a house party yesterday and um it didn't start and I was cranking it like 45 times and I was pissed off and my mom was like, "Oh, you going to go for a motorcycle ride and cool down?" And I don't know why the I decided to, but yeah, there's there's that. What What all do you have on you right now? Nothing. Okay. All right. All right, man. You are under arrest. Okay. Tell me clean and um hit. There you go. Let your hands go. Let your hands go. Thank you. You want your phone? Grab it in there. Is your phone in here? It's on the Oh, on the Is it all right if I grab it? Yeah. I'm just going to stay with you. I apprecid just starting my day. I do appreciate you coming to the door and talking to me. Okay. Yeah. No, no problem. Sometimes we just got things we got to get taken care of, right? Yeah. Yeah. Am I staying overnight? You'll be staying until you see a judge, but you got a at least one felony if not two. Okay. He was worried about losing his license, but what he should be worried about are the multiple felonies he could have on his record, which means he won't be able to vote, buy a gun, or pass a background check for leasing a car or getting another job. And all this because his lawnmower wouldn't start. That's just insanely stupid. Collaborating started with the month of the chase yesterday. Um, he's asking if you would continue to collaborate a little bit. Can we get your helmet and your letters? Oh, where's it at? Are these the right shoes? Yeah. Do I have to lose the shoes? Huh? Do I You guys have to take the shoes. Hey, Garrett. Yeah. Did you see the Facebook post? No, I don't really use Facebook. All right. Did you know about it? No. I think it was on the sheriff's page and it was on the like some news page, local like Columbia County scanner or something. Basically, it was uh asking for cooperation that you just call us and reach out and talk to us about the incident. Mr. Speedy was charged with two counts of felony fleeing, fleeing, and eluding an officer and misdemeanor hit and run. On July 1st, 2023 in Washington, police confronted a woman believing she had active warrants. I didn't know that. Yeah. Okay. Sorry. Cuz I'm I'm homeless. Uhhuh. But um can can I can I go to the police station and ask them? Cuz last time I last time I asked um Go ahead. Last time I asked, they told me to change my address, but I didn't know what what day the the the court is. See, check with the jail. Well, it depends. The jail might take you today, so we're going to find out real quick. Okay. Um, can I go to the police station? No, you we're going to go to jail here in a moment if they say yes. Okay. They last I called them and they told me that I have to um change my address so I could go to court. You have a court? Yeah. Okay. Well, you have a the warrants are still good. So, the jail I I don't know. I I I have to go change my address because I'm homeless. Okay. Well, the your address doesn't matter with the warrants. It's uh there's I know, but it's just I just got out of jail. So, um they told me they were going to give me time so I could go to court. What? Okay. Okay. Can I go to court? Can I go to the police station right now? No. This woman doesn't seem to understand that when you have active warrants, you go straight to jail because that's the law. But that doesn't stop her from continuing to come up with excuses. I have I have um emergencies I have to go I have to take care of so I could go to jail. I don't know when that I they told me to that I need to change my address so I could go to court. Mhm. Well, unfortunately, if the jail says that they'll take you, you have to go with with I know, but I need to change my address. Well, you can change it up. You can tell them. They'll change it for you at the at jail. Okay. Okay. So, what can I do now? Because I have I have emergencies I have to take care of. Yeah, they're going to have to wait. Emergencies, we'll have to wait. Okay. Okay. So, all right. Put your hands behind your back. All right. Cuz you're under arrest. Okay. Go. Why? Put that stuff down there. Can I Can I Could you bring another police officer? Yeah, they're coming. Yeah. Okay. Can I Could you Could you Okay, they're coming. You want to wait for another police officer? Yeah. Okay. She can wait for as many other police officers as she wants, but it won't change the fact that she tried to avoid turning herself in when she knew she had active warrants. It's a pretty dumb move to continue stalling the inevitable. Can I close the door? No, not now. Listen. All right, they will take you. So, you're under arrest. Okay. Can I wait for another police? We'll wait. Yeah, they'll they're coming. I got a couple more coming. Okay. I have to change my address. I called. Last time I called, they told me I have to change my address. Yeah. Okay. Yeah. You can do that, but not not before. You want to leave any of that stuff behind? Oh, no. I'm I'm I'm waiting for the police officer so that I could explain to them what I they told me at the police. I'm a police officer. So, even after explaining everything to her multiple times, she still can't comprehend that it has nothing to do with her address. And her attitude towards the officer standing right in front of her just makes this lady look even more silly. I can put your handcuffs right now if you want. Real quick. No, it's cuz I have I I have to talk to a a female. Well, can I talk to a female? I don't have a female working. Could Can I talk to a female? Nope. There's no female working. Okay. So, I have to change They told me that I have to change my address. Uh-huh. At this point, she's sounding like a broken record, and it's one that won't stop playing anytime soon. When the other officer arrives, she gives her explanations again, like it would make any difference at this point. Can I explain to him what what um they told me at the police station? Yeah, you told me already. It doesn't It doesn't need to be explained. Can I explain something to you? He's my boss, so Oh, well, I I last time I called the police station, they told me I have to change my address so I could go to court. Well, you didn't do that. So now I know, but uh I'm homeless. You were given time. Go ahead and step out of the car. But and they told me that I have to change my address so I could go to court. I'm going to help you. You I'm going to help you make that that change. I haven't talked to no police officer, though. Okay, here's the deal. You're talking to two police officers right now. Yes, but I don't know what crime I committed. Listen Listen. You have a warrant for burglary. Okay. But what is that? You're under arrest. Okay. Why am I under arrest? For your warrant for burglary? I don't know. I didn't know I had a warrant. Okay. We're telling you that right now. She literally has two officers explaining things to her now. Yet, she makes herself look even more dumb by continuing with these repetitive arguments. The cops are getting tired of her games, and they know she's doing it only because she's desperate to avoid jail. I'm homeless. I didn't I don't know why I'm getting under arrest. Cuz you have a warrant for I know, but why do I have for a warrant? Because either it was a failure to comply with a court order or you missed a hearing. Basically, I know why you I didn't know I missed a hearing. Okay. You were violating the order. I They told me I don't know what's going on, though. I They told me I have to change my address. Okay. Well, you didn't do it. I know, but I'm currently working on that. The female told me that I have to change my address. Can I leave this? Yeah, you can leave whenever you want. [Music] Can I The female told me I have to change my address so I could go to court. Come on. If every homeless person can use this as an excuse, everyone who has a warrant would be sleeping in the streets by now. This woman's lies aren't even coherent. First, she said the court told her. Then she said the other police officers did, and now it's some other woman that told her. I'm trying to go to court. No, you're under arrest. Step out of the car. I don't know why I'm getting under arrest. We told you. Okay. Okay. Could you call the police? I am the police. I know, BUT WHY AM I UNDER ARREST? You're going to get a charge for resisting arrest. Now, put your hand behind your back. But why am I getting under arrest? Why are you arresting me? Why are you Why are you arresting me? [Music] Toddlers can comprehend ideas better than this woman. Even as she's placed in the cop car and driven to jail, she just keeps repeating the same questions, arguments, and demands. Could she be under the influence of something? I mean, come on. Something's going on here. But why am I under arrest? Because you have two warrants for your arrest. Okay, but I'm trying to go to court. Have you used any drugs today? No. No. Have you consumed any alcohol? No. Okay. So, no methamphetamine today. No methamphetamine today. Um, yes. You have used methamphetamine today. Okay. How long ago? Um, how long ago? Uh-huh. 20 minutes. 10 minutes ago. Okay. Well, that might be why you're reacting this way. Okay. One of the side effects of methamphetamine is that it gives you the memory span of a goldfish. Having a conversation with someone on these drugs is like running a verbal marathon. It feels like you've run for miles, but you're still just at the beginning. Hey, are you guys uh are you guys ready for her? She's waking out pretty good on that. We'll check. All right. So, what's your brother's address? My brother's address? I don't know. I have to call him. Okay. Do you know his number? Um, not no computer. I not not right now. Can I talk to a police? Can I'm trying to update my address. Yeah, right. To your brother's address, right? Yeah. You'll notice that she's clenching her teeth together. That's another side effect of meth. It causes the muscles in your body to tense up, especially in your jaw, and that makes people grind their teeth. She finally gets to talk to a female officer as requested. And I'm guessing you already know what she'll say. Can I talk? Can I talk to the female? Yep. She's right here. Yeah, right here. Okay. So, I did I need to I'm going to go to court. Okay, I'll be right there. That'll happen eventually, but right now we're just going to check you out. Okay. Okay. But why am I under arrest? Do you have a warrant for your arrest? I What's a warrant? So, when the judge wants you arrested, they an arrest warrant. This is what you have. We're just dealing. She said she said she just used under arrest. You have a bar. It's [ __ ] cold. Like I said, the lessons of the day here are number one, don't do meth. And number two, stalling the cops doesn't save you from anything. This woman's going to feel pretty dumb after this. She was jailed for her original warrants for burglary and additionally charged with resisting arrest. On October 20th, 2021, officers spotted a Black Kia sedan speeding through a red light. Officers identified the driver when he sped past them with the windows down. Slowing down. He's slowing down up there. Yeah, slowing down. Slowing down. He's going right. No, he's right. He's right there. I'm going to stop him. Driver, get back in the car. Back in the car. Get back in the car. Roger. Roger. Get in the car. Driver, bro. I'm getting some wood to the store. They harass me, bro. Back in the car. I ain't even know. I'm not doing nothing. You can't make in the car. No. Call your sergeant. Don't touch me, bro. Behind your back, bro. My head's behind my back. Bro, I'm not doing nothing, bro. What the Bro the car. All right. I'm not going there, bro. What the you bothering me for, bro? What this man doesn't know is that the vehicle was caught on multiple cameras, so there's no point claiming that he didn't do anything wrong. A female is also in the car, and she decides she wants to create more problems. Why is he getting arrested, bro? I'm not doing, bro. I'm not doing, bro. I'm not doing, bro. Relax. Stop. Why? What am I doing? Stop. What the What is you doing? I ain't even doing ran a red light. That's not me driving. I SWEAR TO GOD THAT'S NOT, BRO. We told you you both over. Told you to get back in the the pull me over. You're lying, bro. Catch up TO YOU. I'M NOT DRIVING. RELAX. Hell no. Cuz I'm sick of y'alling with me, bro. For real. I'm not even doing [ __ ] bro. I'm not doing a thing, bro. Y'all keeping with me. I'm sick of y'all hitting your bro. Stop. What's your This guy just did the dumbest thing he could do. Threaten to assault a police officer. And does he really think after behaving like this the cops are just going to let him go? Anyone calling an officer bro while being arrested is not someone the cops want to go easy on. No, cuz I'm not doing [ __ ] bro. Bro. Hey, bro. Martin, man. Come on, brother. Ch. God damn, man. What up, man? I'm not doing nothing, bro. Tired of these people with me, bro. Man, no. You're not taking me to jail till you call Sergeant, bro. I didn't say you are. Just detain right now. What am I detained for? A traffic stop. Okay. I'm not driving, so you can't say that. Okay. During a traffic stop, all occupants. I wasn't driving. So, you need to talk to her who was driving. Don't talk to me. Let me go. Okay. You're going to go in this guard. No, I'm not going to go anywhere. You're gonna let me go because I'm not doing anything. Oh, so you talking about trying to trying to tell you what's going on, but you're not willing to hear me out, bro. You just came in the store and tried to arrest me for no reason, bro. Told you to get back and get in the car. No, you're not going to tell me to do a damn thing cuz you're not stopping me for no reason. You're not going to I don't care about empty my pockets for you, bro. I don't got a weapons or anything. I don't got noing things on me, bro. Nothing at all, bro. Damn, bro. No, bro. I'm not getting in that car, bro. Until you call the s. I'm not doing nothing to your tummy till you call me a sergeant. Bro, call me. I promise you die, bro. If you don't call me no sergeant or lieutenant, bro, I will call somebody to get y'all fired, bro. It seems like all this guy wants to do is threaten the cops. Threats like this are not taken lightly, and if he actually knew the law, he would know this could earn him a separate charge. Still detained. You're not going to You're not going to detain me if I wasn't driving wall right now. You're not going to detain me for that? No, you can. I know the law. I got the law in my Don't touch me. Stop pushing me. I'm not getting in this car. Have a seat. No, I don't want to have a seat. I don't have to. Don't you make me sit down. I'm I'm I'm going charge you for abuse, bro. I swear to God, I own I'm going to charge you for police brutality. You know what I'm saying? That's police brutality, bro. I ain't even doing Why am I being arrested? You're not being arrested right now. You're being detained for what? You were resisting. Yes, you were. I was resisting. You call that resisting? Absolutely. I was sitting in the car. And I asked you to step out. Did you step out now? No, you didn't. Have we called this out yet, J? Yeah. Hey, can you sit with her real quick? Yeah. Are you okay? What's that? You're bleeding. Am I talking? Why are you bleeding? Little scuffle. I can't stop driving, bro. Yeah, he wasn't driving. Okay, it doesn't matter. So, listen. During a traffic stop, all occupants of the car are detained during the traffic stop. Okay, but why am I in handcuffs? He literally just explained this to her. The injured officer could have easily used more force on the female suspect, but he chose not to. The suspects have escalated this situation to this level with their aggressive behavior. So, I don't know what happened with my partner and you. I I from what I was overhearing, he asked you to step step out. No, he didn't. I don't know what what what he was asking, but it's a a traffic stop. He left with me. I'm just explaining things to you. You have to answer. We stopped you. Nobody can leave. Shut up. The store wasn't listening to us. Wasn't listening to me. I told him just simply return to the car. It's a traffic stop. He said no. Outright said no. to physically drag him back at back out here. All occupants he wasn't driving. All occupants during a traffic stop are not free to leave regardless if they're driving or not. All right, we're calming down now. We're just going to do the regular traffic stop. See where we're at. All right. Is he still going to jail? He He never was. All he had to do was return to the car. He's a [ __ ] idiot. And there was really no reason for things to get to this point. Well, at least she had some sense to come to that conclusion. Things have now escalated to the point where multiple police units need to be called to the scene. And then we learned that there are more people in the vehicle. Can you get that key and hand it to her, please? Yes, Brandy. Call his mom. Call my mom, please. Assalter. I don't know what else is in here. There's a a crack stem sitting on the seat as well. So, let's pull her out too then, just in case. Ma'am, you want to Hey ma'am. Ma'am, just hang out by the front of the car. Officer. Ma'am. Bro, listen. Bro, can y'all please let me get to court, man? Please don't let me this DCF case, bro. Please, bro. Please, bro. Please, bro. Please. What do you got? A DCF case. I got I got to go to court now, man. Y'all pulling her over and [ __ ] bro. I don't care, man. We got to figure this out first, man. Okay, sir. I need to get to court, man. I can't. We got to figure this out first. All right. DCF stands for Department of Children and Families. It's a state agency that investigates allegations of child abuse and neglect. Is he telling the truth about having a court date? Or is all of this a manipulation tactic? Oh, cuz I'm in handcuffs for nothing, bro. There's a reason why you're in handcuffs, man. Yeah, cuz y'all can't find out what's going on. Oh, they they know what's going on. Well, they know what's going on. Why they got me in handcuffs? They got you in handcuffs cuz it was the traffic stop. Because you didn't listen to him like he arrested you. I don't have to listen to him. I'm not a driver. I'm a passenger. I'm a passenger. I don't have to stop when they tell me to stop. All people in the car get detained. No, it does not. That's not the law. That's the driver that gets detained. I know the law. That law got passed in 2009. No, I know for a fact I got on my phone. Hopefully, he didn't go to law school. Otherwise, he should really ask for a refund of that tuition money. The cop told the male suspect what they saw and how their camera caught it. But this man still insists that he wasn't driving. Maybe this guy's memory lapse has something to do with the drug paraphernalia that can plainly be seen in his car. You say you seen me driving, but I'm'll be honest with you. I'm be so real with you. This time I wasn't. Okay? And that's your right to argue that. I'm not going to argue. I'm just going to tell you a fact. I'm going to give you straight up cuz I got a DCF case today. I'm trying to get my kids. So, no, I wasn't. But you see me, you know what I'm saying? Flagging out the car without my seat belt on. Yes, you did. Okay. I ain't had no seat belt on. I was leaning over. Yes, I did. my my passenger side door does not open, so I got to get out through the u driver's side. Notice that he says, "This time I wasn't." Seems like he's perhaps been called in a similar situation before. And it's pretty ironic that he's worried about the kids when there's a crackpipe sitting on the seat. Maybe the guy's telling the truth about the car door. So, the cops move to the vehicle to investigate. I'm going to help you search. When you do a traffic stop, when you're traffic stopping the person that's driving, you're supposed to run everybody name in the car. Correct. Okay. You supposed to Yeah, you have to. That's protocol. You have to run my name first to see if I have any warrants or any open charges that I'm doing something wrong. We just do that. No, you have to do that. That's protocol. I read the law book yesterday. You mind clearing it? I only got one. Huh? Do you mind clearing it? I only got one glove box. Mhm. Yep. There you go. Steady. One round fell. Oh, there it is. What are these things? Yeah. Yeah, but look. It looks so weird. That's a It's a squid. Yeah. It's still hot. That's a That's a W. Come on, buddy. But would you look at that? Not only does the door work perfectly fine, but there's a firearm in the car with split bullets. The cops got further confirmation after reviewing the footage from the gas station surveillance camera. So, they showed it to the suspect and his fate was sealed. I want to be here for this. I was already on a seat, bro. You're a liar. I got you. I'm wearing hair, bro. Let's go to jail. Come on, bro. Let's go. Hey, S. Sorry, bro. You had a chance to be honest. You lost that with me. Lost that. She's telling you, bro. You're lying. Now, watch the video. It's clear as day. You're driving the car. No, I'm not, bro. I got a driver's seat. In the passenger, bro. That's cuz she had to get in the passenger seat. You good with the car, Jimmy? And that's another reason why you shouldn't lie to the cops. The woman was charged with resisting without violence, and the male driver was charged with resisting without violence, driving without a valid driver's license, and possession of a controlled substance. There were definitely some very dumb decisions made in all these situations, but thankfully, justice was served, and none of them got away with their crimes. We hope you enjoyed this compilation of the dumbest criminals ever.